Every time Britney leaves her house it seems like the O.J. Simpson chase

I'm down to watching maybe 45 minutes of TV a night and unfortunately I turned it over to CNN at one point to see the latest about the Michigan primary...however nope..none of that...I saw a helicopter following Britney Spears around town. I won't go into the lunacy of this whole thing but it does seem like every time she leaves the house now..that it turns into the white bronco chase. WHICH IS GREAT...because I was in a field out near P.H.'s house drinking a fifth of Cisco with SC, JF, PH, a guy named PUMPKIN and a guy named John, so we missed the whole thing. However we were fortunate we didn't get pulled over because we were five white guys in the back of a Blazer driven by a black guy named Pumpkin. I learned a lot that night without the help of O.J.; A.) Jon F. can't hold his liquor B.) To get more Krystal burgers take a few out as soon as you get the bag..then promptly ask what happened to my other two burgers..thanks Pumpkin C.) Cisco tastes like a skank.