In the Year 2000...

Over the course of 2002, I purchased a few Sun tabloids that advertised visions of the future via prophecies (both Biblical and by famous soothsayers). Five years later, I figure now's a good a time as any to dig them out from the promised apocalyptic rubble and see just what the Sun got right. So off we go with the first installment, from Edgar Cayce, the "Sleeping Prophet" from Hop-town, Kentucky.

Selected predictions for 2003 from Edgar Cayce

+ "The leader of a powerful, English-speaking country will be forced to resign after journalists unveil his financial ties to an organized crime syndicate. The criminal organization will seek revenge by planting bombs in small towns."

Confirmed. If you recall, Martha Stewart, home goddess and business tycoon, was indicted for insider trading and obstructing a criminal investigation on June 4, 2003 and she resigned from her position of CEO and editor of Martha Stewart Living shortly thereafter. Cayce, a Southerner born in the 1800's, probably saw Stewart running a business and just assumed it was an effeminate man. As far as the retaliation bombs are concerned, who knows what shit she ran from the joint, man.

+ "A devastating plague, similar to Mad Cow Disease, will pour out of North Africa across Europe. Like swine flu, it will affect livestock first, then humans. Millions of people will be sickened, and the world's meat industry will collapse."

False. Taco Bell expanded to China, not Europe, in 2003.

+ "Global warming will trigger catastrophic floods across America's heartland in spring 2003. At least 29 states bordering the Great Lakes, the Mississippi River and its tributaries will be affected."

Confirmed. This tragic event was best documented in the timely film Boat Trip, which captured the horror of the tragic floods of early 2003 as two men struggled to survive the rising seas, escaping by boat. Subsequently, those 29 states that decided to show the movie were indeed affected by its gripping action and poignant, life-changing themes.

(By the way, do not ever search for "Jetsons" in Google image search with SafeSearch off. Trust me.)