Hot Hot Twitter person I follow Hot

SWM seeks fiery redhead into skiing, Thai food, old movies, walks on the beach, snuggling, omg woman QUIT SUFFOCATING ME

Sometimes I wish my son was more like me. Or at least the same ethnicity.

My son said "I love you, sir" for the first time. I slapped him and sent him away, then stood at my study window, mustache wet with tears.

I was halfway through the appendectomy when I realized that Wikipedia was full of shit.

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